Somehow, it's already the weekend. The END of the weekend. I don't know where my time goes...granted, part of it is because I was sick this week. That never helps. But all the same...I've been back for almost a month already! I only have a little over three months left with all my Nantais friends...and only 4 more in France. Granted, perspective is everything: when I started college, three or four months felt like FOREVER. now...I find myself saying only.
Part of it is the fact that I have no balance right now. I've been spending the past three weeks going to class, of course, but not doing much work outside of class. I just haven't had much! except, of course, the Junior IS looming over my head. I was about to email my adviser at the beginning of the week to tell her what I was thinking and get some feedback, but then I got sick. and then she emailed me first with deadlines and assignments -time to face the IS music! but it just made me panic a little...I need to get moving on it. and the weather is doing some crazy things here...one day it's horribly disgustingly rainy and cold and the next it's sunny and 60. When it's that nice out, I start to think that it's March, April in NY or OH, which is also what created this minor panic/anxiety feeling today. The weather is tricking me into thinking it's later in the semester than it really is!
I think the reason I'm so freaked out by the idea of the end of the semester is because I love it so much here. I have an amazing group of friends. I feel comfortable in this environment. I'm a lot more comfortable with my French and it's incredible the difference it makes. I'm settled, and the idea of moving again really unbalanced me, mentally. and yet, to be completely contradictory, I had such a bad case of home/woostersickness this weekend. Part of it was the fact that Winter Gala was last night...while I didn't go my freshman year, I had so much fun my sophomore year, and now I missed out on it my junior year. it's all about tradeoffs, I understand that (I get to live my French dream!) but it doesn't stop things from being difficult every now and then. especially when I'm tired.
hopefully I can get a good night's sleep and feel less anxiety-bordering-on-panic in the morning.
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I hope you had a good nights sleep. It is not March or April here, -2 last night. You can look forward to your senior Winter Gala. It will be special. Friends are friends always. Yours have complete confidence in you. A few bumps now can be uncomfortable but expected.
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