...there are no words

Seriously. there are just no words to describe the spectacle I witnessed last night. I went to see the Casse Noisette (the nutcracker) with a group from IES. Now, when you hear "Tchaikovsky's Nutcracker" what do you think? Amazing ballet, tutus, live orchestra? That's what I think of, at any rate. I suppose that was what I was expecting...and it turns out that was a very big mistake.

Rather than classical ballet, beautiful costuming and the typical toy soliders and mice and sugarplum fairies, we got...well, I'm not entirely sure WHAT we got. We got a blind paranoid schitzophrenic, soliers with gas masks, and a Drosselmeyer that looked more like Zoolander than anything else! It was this strange production that seemed more like modern/interpretive dance than ballet with some tumbling and acrobatics mixed in for good measure. There were some great moments to it, though...Clara and two of the soldiers did an incredible pas de trois in which her feet were never on the ground for more than three seconds for about 4 minutes. Drosselmeyer covered the stage in glitter at one point...he threw some up in the air and then tons of it started falling from the rafters...with the spotlights shining on it, it was absolutely gorgeous. oh! also, when I looked at my ticket, it said "Loge 12." I knew that le fantome de l'opéra always sat in "Loge 5" and loge was a vocab word when we read the Fantome in 12th grade (that was forever ago...) so I knew that loge = box. I open the door to my loge and it LITERALLY a little box with 2 chairs in it, so I can now say I've sat in a balcony box at an opera! it was great fun, even if it was a little (okay a LOT) wierd. a group of us girls went to the café Le Molière for chocolat chaud (hot chocolate) afterwards.

Tomorrow is the Mont Saint Michel outing...I'm so excited! and I bought train tickets for a weekend in Paris with Alex and Meghan...plus a group of us might go to Dublin after fall break! huzzah! Tonight, though, is a lounge-in-pjs and listen to music and read in english and play scrabble online kind of night. I've had such a crazy week...I'm not used to not ending my school day and getting home until 6.45 in the evening...at the earliest. there are days I still have CLASS from 5.30-6.30! it's quite the change from Wooster's all-classes-end-by-4 way of doing things. but I got to start the argentian tango class today, which was great fun. I really do enjoy tango...I just wish there were more than 5 guys in a class of 30ish...ah well. I'm just glad I already know what I'm doing...it makes the language barrier less of an inhibition.

à +
(that's the french equivalent of ttyl...sort of stands for "à plus tard," or "until later")

awkard middle school dance à la français?

Well. What an...interesting evening. there had been a poster on our mirror at IES (yes, that's how announcements are made at IES - a piece of paper taped to the mirror) that announced a reception at l'institut polytechnique (yep, polytechnic institute) for us IES students. it said it was at 6...I was expecting to hop on the tram, chat for a bit, and be back to IES in an hour or so.

ohhhh was I mistaken. First off, it took almost an hour to GET there. I'm completely lost by the time we finally arrive at the university (not the same university (fac) I take classes at) and are ushered into this room where there are maybe 20 guys and (literally) 2 girls standing around. so us poor confused IES students stand in an awkard cluster wondering if anyone's actually going to say anything...and finally the profs welcome us, saying that it's a good chance to meet people, especially since (and I quote) "l'institut polytechnique est presque seulement les hommes, et vous chez IES sont pour la pluspart les femmes." for those of you who don't speak french, the director of my program actually told us that it was a good chance to meet people since "the polytechnic school is also only men, and you all at IES are for the most part all women."

...I'm sorry, but did my prof just try to set us all up on blind dates or something?!? So imagine this...all the IES students awkardly keeping to one side of the room, remarking how much it hearkens back to the days of middle school dances with the boys on one side of the room, girls on the other, and everyone afraid of venturing into the middle. We eventually started mingling, but this was my problem: I'm a double major in french and women's studies - the latter of which doesn't even EXIST in france and tends to make french men uncomfortable -or at least confused -when I say it. What on EARTH do I have to say to engineers and IT people and computer programmers?!? Even if everyone in the room spoke the same language fluenty, I just DON'T have anything to say to them!

so yes; I had a wonderfully AWKWARD night. (and I didnt even get home until 9.15)

the redeeming point to the day was that I attended my salsa class and it made me very happy =D

oh and I had a brilliant idea for my French Junior IS - we'll see if it actually lasts until next semester when I have to write it.

and now, even though it's only 9.30...I'm heading to bed. I have an 8am class at the fac tomorrow.

bonne nuit à tout et tous!

Slight rant against the French education system

Okay, not so much a rant as a notice of frustration. I’m used to the American education system where you register for classes quite literally months ahead of time. You know exactly when and where your classes will be, and they always start when they’re supposed to. Here…not so much. As I discovered this past week, the likelihood of them starting when they supposedly do is pretty much nil. I finally figured out that the lit courses wouldn’t be starting this past week, so I gave up on them. My Argentinean Tango class, however…that I was expecting to start. My friends’ sports at SUAPS had definitely started this past week, so I was looking forward to meeting some French people and getting the chance to dance for a bit. But…you guessed it. Tango doesn’t start until October, apparently. Now, I’m okay with spontaneity – to an extent. When it comes to academia, however…I miss the structure of the states! plus I just really wanted to dance...

Anywho, the week finished up relatively well, I suppose…I had a total meltdown/panic attack on Thursday, but it’s all better now. I had one of those great aha! moments that made me realize I was being an idiot and trying to make myself be someone I’m not. Yes, it sucks to be an introvert in a situation like this. But…a tiger don’t change [her] stripes, to paraphrase Sawyer (yes I just had a LOST geek moment. Deal with it!)

Today I went to visit L’Ile de Nantes’ very own Babar…and for those of you who aren’t lucky enough to know who Babar is, Babar is a cartoon elephant with whom most French children grow up. L’Ile de Nantes has something called Les Machines de l’Ile…one of which is an enormous Elephant. A mechanical elephant that you can ride! It’s absolutely enormous and an engineer miracle…it moves exactly like real elephants do…to the point that it has a hose in its trunk and sprayed water at the kids watching it walk! Its hard to properly explain it…but it was really fun to watch.

Now for a random observation of France (well, at least of Nantes):

In the states, I feel like there’s an expectation that you have a different outfit for each day –or at the very least, a different shirt. It seems like there’s a pressure to have a large quantity of clothing. Here, however, they’ll literally wear the same outfit 3, 4, even 5 days in a row. Mme Rouchet, I’m sure, has only a few ensembles –but I’ll bet you anything they’re all very nice, slightly pricier, high quality ensembles. It doesn’t phase anyone here to see the same outfit all week, but it seems like in the states that implies having either slept in your clothes or pulled an all-nighter. Like with food, there seems to be a quality over quantity mentality to how they approach clothing. And then there’s the actual clothing itself. Some of the outfits I’ve seen are incredible chic, elegant and timeless –tailored suits, well-made dresses, beautifully cut skirts and slacks. Others, though…I just have to stop and wonder about the people. Their outfits are definitely things you could only get away with in France. There was one woman who had a blouse that had these huge flat-disc-sequin-things on it…the kind of things I remember using to decorate posters and scrunchies when I was maybe six... but there were fringes of these sequins on the cuffs, hem and collar of this blouse…it was si bizarre!

Après la pluie, beau temps

the title's a french proverb that translates to "after the rain, good weather." Yesterday was pretty much a nightmare - the liasions dangereuses class isnt going to start until next week, so I wasted my time going back to the Fac in the afternoon, too. It turns out I had been in the wrong building completely...the only bright side to yesterday was that I got a chance to sign up for both the salsa class and the argentian tango class at the Fac. hopefully those'll give me a chance to get centred again (I miss dance so much and it's amazing how dependent I became 'cause it was such a good destressor) and make some French friends - goodness knows I love my dance group back in the states! anywho, yesterday was a bust academically; monday I had a grammar course in the morning but French Writers in Forgein Nations was cancelled. The lit course schedualed at the fac today also wont start until next week, but I did have France in the Atlantic World and my grammar course at IES, so today was less of an academic bust than hier. and I bought a copy of Les Liaisons Dangereuses today and started reading it - it's amazing how much the movie Cruel Intentions was based off of Les Liaisons...

anywho, once all my classes actually start, I'll be taking the following (probably):
at the fac: Les Liaisons Dangereuses
Les Fables de La Fontaine
Princesse de Clèves
(all of which are litterature courses)
at IES: France and the Atlantic World from the 16th-18th Centuries (history course)
Topics in Advanced Language and Grammar
French Writers in Foreign Nations

plus the salsa and tango classes, though those are more like extracurriculars

so yeah. basic update...
à plus tard...

the morning that just shouldn't have happened

This morning I had an 8am class at the FAC, so I got up at quarter of six when the stars were still out and my friends in the states probably hadn't even gone to bed yet. So I get up, shower, grab some breakfast and get myself out the door...listening to superchick on my ipod in hopes of staying awake and keeping up my energy. I get on the TAN, go to the FAC...get off a stop too soon (whoops...) and walk the rest of the way in the barely-post-dawn cold until I see the building where my class is. Victory! Well...not quite. I still have to find the classroom. No worries, though, I've still got twenty minutes till class (good thing I left the aparte an hour early!) So I start looking for the classroom...I found the psychology wing, the philosophy wing, the geograpy wing, the classics studies wing, the history wing...anything, of course, but french literature. It's 8 o'clock by this point....if I can find the classroom asap I won't be *too* late. no such luck. it's now quarter after and I have to accept defeat -I've been wandering around the building for half an hour and I've seen every hallway twice. I have NO idea where this classroom is, so I have to resign myself to the fact that I'm just going to have to miss the first day of class. Hopefully I'll be able to find the classroom next week...and hopefully I'll be able to find the classroom for the OTHER lit course I have in 3 hours. So then I try to get a TAN back to IES...and the door closes and the TAN leaves right as I'm about to get on. Once again...I am left frustrated and about to cry, feeling nothing but completely incompetent and useless. It's mainly just that I'm in a foreign country and EVERYTHING is significantly more complicated. Even the simplest of things - finding a place to eat, figuring out where a damn classroom is, even expressing how you're feeling becomes infinitely more difficult. For someone who considers herself pretty articulate and well-spoken, the lack of language is the hardest thing. Sure, my french is pretty good...but it's also pretty basic. I use the same vocabulary over and over and I find myself unable to say what's on my mind, how I'm feeling or anything like that.

ugh. it'll get better. I know it will. It's just that right now...it sure doesn't feel like it.

one week down

Well. I wasn’t kidding when I said I might be able to update this weekly! It should be easier to update more frequently in the future, though, because this past week was complètement FOLLE! (completely INSANE!) The days would start at 9.30 in the morning and we wouldn’t get back until 7 or 7.30 – sometimes as late as 8 o’clock. Most of it was just typical start-of-college orientation; safety, meal planning, guides to the “campus” (heh rather the large confusing city of Nantes!), that sort of thing. There were also three “classes” – conversation with Mme Rouchet, langue Francaise with Mme de Pous, and grammar with Julie. Mme Rouchet is pretty much the most adorable French woman I’ve ever met! She’s the epitome of une femme francaise…sophisticated, chic and so composed. She’s got that air of a French woman I would LOVE to possess, but it’s something that you acquire only through being French and living in France for your life.

Anywho, the week was a roller coaster, to say the least. There were some absolutely exhausting days where I wound up with a headache by 11am from having to think and concentrate so much and crashed into bed at 10.45. At the same time, though, there were days where I was so exhilarated to be here, speaking French and living in France that nothing else mattered. Mme Chancerelle had invited a couple of her friends over one evening for an apéro (aperitif) and it was so much fun…though those women (and the teenage daughter) talked si si si vite (so so so fast) that it was so hard for me to keep up…but I held my own relatively well. It was nice to just sit and be social and have fun!

Its just so interesting how different some things are here. Meals, for example…I still haven’t gotten used to eating dinner between 8 and 8.30…if you know my family, you know we eat between 5.30 and 6. Now I’ll have class from 5.30-6.30! Plus the meals are smaller…the French tend to go for quality rather than quantity, something SO different from the supersized MacDo meals in the states (heh they call McDonalds MacDo here). The other thing I’ve noticed is that at least in Nantes they know how to do more with less. Less space – my aparte is so much smaller than our house at home, but the huge windows and furniture arrangements seem to open up the space a lot better. Not to mention the fact that said huge windows reduce the need for turning lights on significantly. And the really neat thing is their “billboards.” Rather than being these huge monstrosities that require huge amounts of paper and lumbar and can only advertise one thing at a time, they have essentially big tv screens that rotate digital advertisements! Definitely less of a waste of energy and resources here. Granted, nowhere’s perfect, obviously, but…it’s nice to see progress all the same.

All in all, things are going pretty well here. I finally had a breakdown moment last night because I was so overwhelmed and tired and we had free time…now I see why we keep kids so busy at Whitman: give them time to do nothing and the homesickness and loneliness will swamp them. But I’m better now =D and I’m very much looking forward to starting classes tomorrow! Despite the homesickness/feeling lonely, it's amazing how right it feels here. I'm so happy I chose Nantes over Paris...of course I want to go visit Paris (et, bien sur, ma cherie Alex!), but I'm glad I'm here. Nantes feels right =)

oh là là...

Coucou tout le monde! What a full weekend! Thursday was realitively uneventful, just driving to Vannes, playing those horrible ice breakers that always have to happen, and getting to the hotel. We had dinner at the hotel and then just explored Vannes for a bit...and then my roomie and I talked till almost 2 in the morning...I guess we hadn't quite adjusted to the new time zone yet. Friday...Friday was pretty much the PERFECT day. We went to an old castle called Suscinio and had a guided tour (of which I was pleased with myself for understanding) and then went to L'Ile aux Moins, a gorgeous island. We had a picnic and biked around for about 3 hours (yes, mum, I actually biked. Gasp!) The bikes even had the fun baskets on the front...si si si française!! At one point we found a boat launch spot where we could take off our shoes and go wading...thus I have officially been in both sides of the Atlantic Ocean!!! The best part was when a random car drove up to the boat launch and we all freaked out that we'd get in trouble so we started to grab our shoes and bikes...and then realized it was just a tourist vans and that we made ourselves look SI coupable (so guilty!). But then we biked around some more and ad,ired all of the amazing cottages...it really did look like so,ething out of a storybook. and I had so,e of the ,ost (ps, the , key is where the m key usually is, but I'm getting sick of fixing it; replace the necessary ,'s with m's) a,azing ice crea, ever on L'Ile aux Moins!

Yesterday was pretty good...toured a country manor rather than a castle in the ,orning and then had lunch at a crèperie, puis we toured one of the megalithes of the Bretagne region. It was a cavern built and carved around 2500 bc, I think. heh and it was small enough that even I had to duck! We wandered around the town for a while ,ore after that (of course I totally forget the na,e) and headed back to the hotel. My roomie and I decided to turn in early, since this morning we had to take our french placement test. It didn't go too terribly, I was just happier than anything to have it done. And i found a café très français and sat on the trottoir (sidewalk) drinking a small cup of espresso: thus begins, I think, my coffee addiction! We spent about an hour after lunch at Rochefort en Terre, ho,e, I believe, to either the oldest or one of the oldest towns in France. It was so ,uch like so,ething out of a fairy tale it's not even funny!! I was so sad that my camera batteries had died by then =/

All in all, it was a pretty good way to start ,y sejour in France. I got to know a lot of ,y classmates and we could reposé (rest) and s'amuse (have fun).
à tout à l'heure!

Vivez La France!

I don't have much time to write, mainly because we're going to be leaving for Vannes soon. Also, more importantly, the keyboards are so WIERD here! Nothing's where I'm used to, so I feel like I'm learning to type all over again!

But the flight was good...though really long they showed Spiderman 3 and Just Friends (didn't watch Just Friends). I sat next to a girl headed to Paris for her grad school studies. I hardly slept at all on the flight...dozed for a while on the train...and then slept for over 12 hours last night =) but I enjoyed getting to know Mme Chancerelle and her daughter Pauline. They live in the epitome of a cute little French apartement...whoops gotta go!
à bientôt!

Unreal reality

Tomorrow. Tomorrow I get on a plane and fly overseas to Paris and then take a train to Nantes. I'll meet my host family (while half asleep, completely jet-lagged, mind you) and...begin a whole new life. People keep asking me "Are you ready?!" and the truth is, I have no idea. I've dreamed of going to France like mum since I was 10. Half of my life, this has been my dream -and now I'm less than 48 hours away from getting it! It feels so incredibly...unreal. I can't wrap my mind around any of it, it just feels so...impossibly unreal. Physically, am I ready? Am I packed? ...well, not quite. I still need to throw in all the random things that have been piled by my suitcase waiting to be packed. Emotionally, mentally...am I ready? I honestly don't know. It's hard to imagine anything of what my life will be in a matter of hours. I've been studying French formally since seventh grade, informally since fourth. I can (and did!) carry on a conversation on the phone, in French, with Mme Chancerelle. I've read some poetry, plays, novels, essays in French and written papers and essays of my own. I've read the expats-who-moved-to-France stories. but all the same, it's going to be so much bigger than that. It'll be a challenge to the extremes I've never faced before...and I'm looking forward to it! Am I excited? of course! Am I nervous? ...try terrified. Am I ready? well...as ready as I'll ever be, I suppose. I've got the gumption to do this...I wouldn't have made it this far without it.

the next time I post on the blog, it'll be a post from La France! I'm not sure when that'll be, given the off-site orientation in Vannes, but I'll try to post my first impressions asap.
à bientôt !